"There's a new day dawning as a cold rain falls
And now's the time to walk alone."
~~ "Man in the rain", Mike Oldfield
My gym instructor has a saying: "Winners never quit, Quitters never win." I think he got it off one of those motivational posters. I saw a de-motivational one with the same saying and the subtitle "But those who never win and still never quit are idiots"
Generally, society considers "giving up" to be a bad thing. It speaks of a lack of perseverance or will-power. An unwillingness to go the distance.
However, sometimes Quitting is thought to be a good thing. Quitting smoking, or a bad job, can be a laudable thing.
But, in both the positive or negative sense, it involves stopping an association or an activity. And there's usually a reason why we stop it.
-------------
I've been thinking a but about divorce lately. In the last few weeks 5 of my friends have split up from marriages or long-term relationships. Another is on the rocks, and could go either way.
I don't know all the details as to why, and the ones I have heard about, I only have one side of the story. So, I won't discuss any specifics on them. But the basis of walking away from a relationship is much the same as walking away from a job, or from smoking: You see more benefit from leaving than you do from staying.
It got me thinking - what is the tipping point in a relationship? Is there a month, a week, a day or even an identifiable second when you go from "If we try harder, we can make this work" to "I can't do this any more".
It is a sudden about turn? A feeling that comes on gradually that you can just pick up and walk away? Statistically, 50% of relationships are doing just that, so it's far from uncommon nowadays.
Do people leave because they no longer want to be in a relationship? Or go because the grass on the other side looks greener? Or that ANY grass would be preferable to the muddy field they're standing in.
Are the people staying and trying to make it work the heroes with the staying power? Or are the ones who aren't winning and aren't quitting idiots? And where is the line drawn?
Interesting questions.... I wish I had some interesting answers. If you do, please comment below....
